Sirs: More Reader Reactions

Greetings, sirs.
I see that our friend and fine, up-standing lady-sir Ms Night has left us another comment:

Dear Future President Sebastian,
I just read your latest article. The photo of you in the hat made me think of Gene Kelly! You look fantastic.

Regarding your accidents on the floor...not to worry. I have an Uncle who does that.

When I read about the 4% statistic I jumped with joy. I knew you were smarter, there was never a doubt in my mind.

Regarding your campaign promises, I will hold you to your word on changing the laws about dogs in hotels. That is a serious issue for certain and it should not fall into the cracks and disappear.

It is good to hear you are single. I just might have a cute bitch for you sometime soon. Would you have a problem with a pre-arranged marriage? Also please don't dismiss your sexually because of the "big snip". I've had 3 Labs, they all had the "snip" and they all found love and happiness with other males. Yes it's true! My dogs were all gay and I am damn proud of them. Think about it my friend!

Question: I was wondering...since you are cared for, do you not feel that in actuality you are the one in charge. Afterall, they are feeding you, grooming you, housing you and cleaning your poop. It would appear that you are the "Master of the house".

Another Question: What is your favorite song? My Labs loved "Who let the dogs out". I was curious as to what your choice would be.

I await your next article. As always, it was a pleasure.

Well, since the Big Snip, my thoughts just aren't as centered on amory. I am purely political these days: I am like many religious figure, like priests and monks of different religions, who uses sexual drive energy in other pursuits.
Perhaps after I have become president, I will have some sex.

Also, I am not a bigot. I can love both fair and dark, as Dr Donne said. If I find a nice male dog to grow gray-muzzled with, I will. If it turns out to be a she, then so be it.
I am like Captain Jack from Doctor Who and Torchwood. I am unisex.
...But I am happy your Labs were down with the Love That Dare Not Sniff Its Butt.

So: In short, I am not look for a love match. I am currently looking for a running mate, though.

I am glad you noticed my household leadership. I am in charge at home -- for the very reasons you point out. Not only have I maintained the household, I have improved it.
Since I arrived, household income has increased. Education levels have increased. General ham (and other meat) levels have increased. So have ambient cuteness levels -- up to 150% in some cases.
If elected, I will use such skills on the country at large. Poop may never appear on sidewalks again. Hams will be plentiful for all dogs. Many humans will have M.A. degrees.

My favourite song?
My taste is very eclectic, and I would be hard pressed to choose one single favourite song. I am a big fan of Belle and Sebastian, though, and 60s piano-based jazz like Herbie Hancock and Vince Guaraldi.

Hams to you lady-sir.